The Secret World Character Drabbles
by Tri-Color
Summary: Follows one Mr. "Tamarak" Croshaw and his friends through the story of the Secret World. No smut, but mentions of polyamory.
1. Chapter 1

Tam, Sal and Krish. Those are the cutesy names they use with each other. It's a weird stand off, enemies being in the field together for so long that they forget they're really enemies. Fighting as a team against a common enemy until they become more comrades than any of their home factions would approve of.

Salus brushes it off as gathering insider information on how the Templars and the Dragons operate. Knowledge that he can later use against anyone he pleases: The Templars, the Dragons or even higher ups in his own little gang. He keeps a little journal filled with tidbits he's caught from phones calls and quiet murmurs in the night. A heavily encrypted journal, which he hides pages of in various places around the world, of course.

He's not Illuminati for nothing.

Krishna is more obvious about it. She growls and bristles, lashes out to protect the innocent. She is saving mankind, dammit, and the two idiots she runs with happen to be part of that category.  
Sometimes she interprets that as 'Keep Tam and Sal safe' and other times it's 'Keep civilians safe from Tam and Sal'.  
If her superiors ever found out she likes to think they would understand. That she's making tactical decisions on the field of war. That, as long as she doesn't give away vital information, her leaders will not vilify her when the time comes for her to be judged.

Tamarak has no such illusions. The Dragon knows he has made this unofficial alliance, the Dragon knows everything. What good is a head that does not keep track of it's claws?  
He also knows that if they truly disapproved that he would have been stopped by now. However, of the three, he has been in his organization the longest. Their 'favourite variable', he was once called. He very nearly ran a chaos charged claw through that woman's neck when she called him that. Simpering sweet tones and an ugly, ugly heart.

These two are just as much a part of the pattern as he is.

'Una Salus Victus', pale skin and pale eyes that give some strange sense of frailty. Tam figures that most albino people look frail, but given how often Sal forgets to eat, his skinny frame and shaking hands make him seem all the more vulnerable. Tamarak smirks behind his shades every time a creature assumes Sal is weak. Their Sal, who is the immovable object to Krishna's unstoppable force.

it is obvious to anyone why Sal chose his secret name. "The one hope of the damned", the young man had proclaimed once to an enquiry in Kingsmouth. The others of Gaia's chosen rolled their eyes at the proclamation and continued in their efforts to hold the Sheriff's station.  
"If he is our last hope", someone in the crowd had muttered, "Then we are well and truly fucked".

Back then the boy had been more bustle than bristle. Tamarak is glad that Sal has bettered himself, been humbled by his failures and still rising to the challenge of keeping the world safe. Too often he sees member of his own clan that think as Sal used to. That they are integral to the equation when they are simply variables.

It's Krishna's name that Tamarak puzzled over. He used to tell her that Kali would have been better, or Valkyrie on a totally different line of history. He only stopped when she told him her name was meant as a goal, to be a beloved hero. That she had never wanted to be some demigod chosen by Gaia. She had never wanted to be some dark herald of change and war.

He does not call her naive to her face, but surely she can see that her desire to cling to innocence will only become perverted into ignorance later down the line. No, Tamarak thinks to himself grimly, she is blind to her path.


	2. Chapter 2

Their first meeting was a strange one, to be sure.

Tamarak was passing through Kingsmouth, following the sounds of bees and collecting information on the old, dying land. The graves and murky depths held knowledge that he wanted, regardless of whether others already knew.  
Knowledge was the key to a greater picture, and Tamarak was tired of being left out.

He encountered the pair of his soon to be partners in the graveyard close to a church that housed on particularly crazed pastor. Salus had climbed up a tree, yelling in panic and shooting undead with his shotgun. Krishna had apparently been drawn by the noise, along with a good twenty other undead, and was trying to help the poor man out.

At that point, the Templar and the Illuminati agent had no idea they were meant to be enemies. The only bad blood between them was that being shed by the small horde Salus had gathered.

They both needed help, Tamarak had thought with a sigh.  
The bees would put them back together, but by the boy's panicked yells he clearly didn't understand that notion. Nor did the girl, seeing how determined she was to save the young man. Her hammer slammed into another zombie's skull and the splat of grey matter could be heard even from across the yard.

Tamarak approached the duo not so much at a jog, but at a lope. Chaos magic crackled and spun around him. Once, twice and by the third spin with his claws out the group had been cleared. Twenty three, by his count, not his best but nothing to sniff at either.

He glanced between the two pairs of round eyes that couldn't look away from him. To be fair, he looked far from normal these days. He had taken to dying his hair and beard blue since leaving Kingsmouth his first time around. The shocking fauxhawk had replaced his office appropriate cut for almost six months now. He always wore sunglasses, mostly to hide the way the filth had changed his eyes.

The filth, now there was the real cause of their stares.  
Veins of filth curled under his skin from countless encounters with the substance. He fought it, hated it and did everything he could to serve Gaia and show he hadn't fallen to temptation. His body was sickly pale, though the skin on his legs and arms looked more like his original tanned skin.  
His eyes though, had been the worst change. The whites were now a dark grey, the lids puffy and constantly irritated behind his glasses. Dark shadows looked almost like bruises under his eyes.

"Don't draw so many of them, take 'em in threes or fours and you two should be fine", he waved them off and turned to continue with his lore finding.

"Wait! You can't jus- OOF", with a crash the albino boy in the tree tumbled down and lay for a moment groaning. Tamarak turned and did nothing to hide his smirk. Kid was all limbs.  
The red haired beauty looked between the two and rolled her eyes,  
"What he meant to say, was thank you"

A Brit, going by her accent. Probably a templar, going by the general theme of red and white in her outfit. Tamarak had no time for Templars, he would rather be underestimated and ignored. Then again, the punk on the ground was likely Illuminati and, even more likely, going to be just as aggravating as the Templar.

"You're welcome, but don't be so afraid. Nothing can truly end us now that we have been touched by Gaia"  
His own voice sounded slightly hollow to his ears. He hadn't really spoken to anyone in months. Just going from place to place, helping people and killing monsters.  
The Voice of the Dragon had told him to take a vacation. Ten minutes later he had gotten a call telling him to go to Venice to meet with a Council member that would get him into Tokyo.

That was a month ago, and Tamarak was stolidly ignoring the order. He would deal with the Council when he was damn well ready. Right now, he wanted some actual time to breath.

"What, just let those freaks chow down? That what you're saying?" The young man had finally risen and was glaring at Tamarak. His eyes were pink and sunken, kid was probably tired out of his mind. Agents never took good care of themselves. Never took care of their own.

"No, of course not. Simply that the bees will revive us if we fall. Death is not the limit it used to be"  
The Dragons had never told him anything, but that was the way the Dragons worked. Only as much information as you needed, unless you went out and pulled it like jewels from their claws.  
Tamarak had always figured the other factions were different but going by the surprised looks of his comrades he was wrong.

He really should get going, but part of him was holding him there. In retrospect Tamarak would admit he had been lonely. That actually talking to people again was nice.

"If you two need help, I could…" He trailed off. Could what? Follow them around like some weirdly protective shadow?

A hand was waved in front of his face and he jerked out of his thoughts to see the woman had moved closer.  
"Be our pleasure, I'm Krishna and" she jerked her thumb back to indicate the deathly pale boy behind them, "That tosser is Salus"  
Her hand moved forward, extended and waiting to be shaken, "You are..?" She prompted while he glanced from her sparking green eyes down to a roughly calloused hand. As he took it in his gloved one and shook he smiled at the firm grip. Definitely a Templar.

"Tamarak"


	3. Chapter 3

He had been sitting in a daze, probably for too long. The others from his cabal had gone to do some missions, but after dealing with the nightmare in the Dream Palace, Tamarak needed some time.

Every time someone spoke he could hear the black signal. The awful buzzing, so discordant and Other compared to the tones of Gaia's bees. He heard the word 'Chuck' like grating sandpaper every time someone used his name. It was like John was determined to make him respond to Chuck. Tamarak had sat here for over a week just reminding himself in his head that he wasn't fucking named Chuck.

Here, sitting in the grass and listening to various Elvis Presley songs rolling out of Johnny Pagan's boombox, Tamarak shivered. The filth in his veins seemed to push and pull at his skin more than usual when he was in Tokyo. His head was always throbbing in some way or another. Using Demonic AEGIS didn't help either, and most things close to the Agartha gate were Demonic. If he could process the idea of getting up, he would have stood and gone to Seoul. Sat in the rain and meditated. Maybe go to Egypt and enjoy the sun on his face.

Panicked yelling, familiar panicked yelling, eventually drew him out of his thoughts. Familiar shocks of red and white hair, panicked eyes. He blinked and shook his head, rising to stand and nearly falling over after being still for so long. Johnny Pagan watched him with an interested eye, curious to see the statue move after so long.

"No, he HAS to be here. You don't understand. Yes, I realize we don't have permission to be in Tokyo but our friend-"  
Krishna's voice, no nonsense but still pleading against the rules. It tugged a grin onto his mouth, ever so slightly.

His smile widened as another voice forced it's way into the conversation,

"We don't freaking care if we're allowed to be here. He's a Dragon, we know this is where he was and we've got to talk to him- Oh, hey Tamarak"

Salus and Krishna were surrounded by members of the Council, obviously trying to stop them before they went further into the city and got themselves killed.

Tamarak loped over and wound his arms around the shoulders of his friends.

"C'mon guys, back to Agartha. Sorry gents, I'll get them out of here" he bowed courteously to the Venetians who nodded in subdued gratitude.

The warm embrace of Agartha was amazing after chill of the black signal. The feeling of two bodies pressed into his sides as they changed dimensions was infinitely calming after days of wondering who he was. His previous confident stance and gentle guiding of his friends devolved rapidly into an exhausted sag. Krishna and Salus shared a look behind his back and led him towards the London portal.

"Weren't answering your phone, mate, we didn't know what else to do", Krishna muttered, her eyes casting anxiously between his blank face hidden behind ever present shades.

"We'll get you to the Tabula Rosa, get some proper sleep into you, jeez man, you look worse than me and that's sayin' something"

They were rewarded with a brief smile and Tamarak ruffled a gloved hand through Salus' pale hair.

"Don't think anyone looks worse than your ugly mug, Sal, not even draugr"  
Another worried glance was shared. Tamarak's voice rasped with lack of use and lack of water.

The trio bought a room with a queen sized bed and ignored the inquiring stare of the clerk behind the desk. She was paid to keep quiet, the Tabula Rosa held all manner of indiscretions in it strange little box. Tamarak pulled his shoes off, dumped his jacket and sweat slick shirt on the floor before falling onto the bed.

Krishna passed the key card to Salus and he quietly left the room to grab them food and drink. She hoped he would be smart enough to pick up some kind of medication, though what could help the blue haired Dragon was beyond her.

"Tam" she started softly, almost hesitantly. She still wasn't sure they had done the right thing. It was one thing to take care of each other in the field, but he had had to start working with his cabal to do missions in Tokyo. Sure, whenever he had spare time he came and fought alongside the duo in Egypt, but the missing third was keenly felt.

A muffled groan came from the slumped body on the bed.

"We just… we got worried, hell if I know how we managed to actually meet up in Agartha together and find the branch to Tokyo, but you stopped answering your phone and-"  
A hand had moved up the bed and rested itself against her leg.

"Relax Krish, I'm sorry I put you in that kind of a situation. I just.. I was a little lost there. I didn't know how long it had been"

His muffled words did nothing to ease her worries.

"Where were you lost?" she intoned softly. She and Sal both knew that it was only a matter of time before they were put in a team and sent to Tokyo to help with the fight there. The problem was, they had no idea what to expect. The branch in Agartha had been covered in filth tendrils, but the park they had ended up in seemed quiet enough.

So if Tamarak had been lost, it certainly wasn't in the physical world.  
She watched him shudder and slowly push himself up.

"I saw… We all saw it, Krish. The dream, the… the signal that fills the filth. It soaks into everything" He turned to her now with a feverish light in his eyes.

Krishna had never seen him scared before.

"He whispers in the gaps, Krish. Plucks at strings and shatters glass and" hands went to his hair. He was pulling at it now. Sunglasses torn off and tossed into a corner. Wide, frantic eyes staring into a landscape Krishna couldn't see.

"He sees it all. Looked inside me. Tore me apart, warped me. Drowned me in a sea of _peace_ "  
The last word hissed out. As if it tasted sour in his mouth. As if it were a curse.

That, Krishna decided, was completely enough of that. She grabbed his shoulders, turned him towards her and slapped him across the face. It shut him up quickly and then she carefully wound her fingers in between his so he would stop tearing at his scalp.  
Comfort was not something Krishna would say came naturally to her. She flew through battlefields with her hammer and chaos magic swirling around her in a maelstrom. Yet quiet noises of wordless protection were coming out of her mouth while she pulled him close. Safety, that was what she was good for. Their forward facing shield, feeling suddenly too young and out of her depth to help Tamarak.

The door slid open and closed. Steaming tacos in each hand and two bags of drinks perched on skinny arms, Sal took the room in with an almost victorious expression. Likely, they weren't supposed to bring food up to the rooms. Even more likely, Salus had fought the point and won.

Still, he toed off his shoes and lined the three pairs up by the door before placing food and drink down next to them. Tamarak's glasses were folded and placed in his jacket pocket, which Sal folded along with Tam's shirt. Three neat piles of clothing, sustenance and shoes were set before Sal sat down on Tam's other side.

It was amazing how much cleanliness Sal required, for the chaos he caused on the battlefield.

While Krishna had her arms around Tam's shoulders, Sal moved his to clutch at Tamarak's abdomen. He nuzzled into the man's shoulder before glancing up to meet Krishna's eyes.

Finally, after a few moments of quiet, she spoke:

"He can't get you here Tamarak, we've got you and we'll keep you safe" 

Another shudder and what almost sounded like a sob wracked through his chest.

"Please. Please Krish, not that name. He knows that name. Every time someone says it, all I hear is him calling me Chuck. Please, please. Not that, my name. You... " His filth stained eyes searched hers before turning to look at Sal.

"You both.. Please, my name. My name is-"  
Sal cut him off, putting a hand over his mouth to muffle the word.

"You can't say it, boyo. You can't do that, you know how dangerous it is to disclose- OW!"

Glaring, the albino man pulled his freshly bitten hand away from Tamarak's mouth.

"I can't hear you say that name right now. Just for a bit. You don't.." Tam looked between them now, "Neither of you have to tell me your real names, but I need to hear something other than… than the name John knows"

A slightly hysterical laugh bubbled up before Tamarak smiled between the two. While not knowing it, both Salus and Krishna were idly wondering if Tamarak had just finally cracked.

With a sudden seriousness that was more appropriate, Tam placed a heavy hand on Sal's shoulder.  
"Keep it secret", Tamarak intoned and then his other hand landed on Krishna's shoulder.  
"Keep it safe" he stared into her eyes.

She couldn't help but roll her eyes to the ceiling. In any other time she would berate him for a bloody Lord of the Rings reference at a time like this, but the quote was oddly fitting.

"For tonight, just.. while we're in this room, please. Call me Ash"

The pair looked at him quizzically. Then shared a look,  
"Is that…" and then Sal stifled a snort, "That short for Ashley?"

Quick as a cat, Tam grabbed a pillow and slammed it over Sal's head.  
"Shut up, you. Ashley was a boy's name once!"

He then tossed the pillow towards Krishna, who deftly caught it and lay down with a smirk of her own. Sal took her cue and settled in on the other side, pulling a still grumbling Tamarak with him.

"Not like I got to pick my birth name guys, c'mon, have some sympathy"

"...Ash, your original name is a kind of tree. Your chosen name is a kind of tree. That is an astounding lack of originality and it is entirely on _your_ part", Krishna calmly sniped while using a mana charged hand to signal the lights to turn off.

Tamarak barked a laugh and slid his arms around the pair, who obligingly curled into him on both sides.

"Well, when you put it like that m'dear, I suppose you're not wrong"

He didn't sleep that night, but at least John's black signal didn't penetrate here, where the air was filled with Krishna's soft snores and Sal's occasional dream whimpers.


	4. Chapter 4

Swearing in this chapter. Sal has a filthy mouth and a filthy mind. He is a substantially more crude character.

* * *

A shock of blue hair and a familiar pair of shades caught Salus' eye as he stumbled out of the warehouse that stowed his faction's secret entrance.  
Well, the boring secret entrance, at least.  
Three hours. He had spent three freaking hours listening to Snooty McFuckface talking down to him about how he needs to go to Transylvania. Werewolves and vampires, whoop de freaking do.  
Sal unceremoniously dumped himself down next to his.. well, whatever the hell Tamarak was. Or should he call him Ash now?  
Probably not. It was a secret, after all.  
"Fuckin' gotta go find some snow clothes and shit. Damn dude, after all the time we've spent in Egypt you could've fuckin' warned us about what was comin' next"

Tamarak simply smirked and cast a glance sideways. Fucking brat knew they would be going to bumfuck nowhere Romania to freeze their butts off. All that, after sweating their faces off in bumfuck nowhere Egypt.  
At this rate, there'd barely be a pair of legs and tits between him and Krishna with all the freezing and sweating off that they'd be doing.

"And ruin the surprise? Why would I do a thing like that, Sal? Besides, don't you thrive on adventure and so on?"  
The gentle teasing in Tamarak's voice was so relieving after that stint at the Tabula Rosa. Smirking and slouching, talking with that fucking twinkle in his eye that said he had all the answers. All the answers, and refusing to give Sal an inch to hang himself with.

"Adventure and so on? Fuck off!" Sal laughed before mussing at the back of Tam's hair. He finally stood and stretched, pulling at the other man's collar.  
"C'mon mr. pomp and circumstance, Krish is probably done getting preached at. Should go to London to get something I can wear in Transylvania without freezing my balls off"

Tamarak rose obligingly, easily slipping an arm around Salus' shoulders.  
"Figure we'll have to deal with that Templar attitude she keeps picking up every time she goes to headquarter's?"

"What? The 'I am a soldier with a Templar cross shoved so high up me arse I should have internal damage' thing? Probably", most of the sentence had been spoken in a high and, frankly, terrible British accent. Still, it was making Tamarak laugh, which meant that he wasn't being a downer.  
Sal was okay with that.

Turned out that Krishna hadn't gotten out of whatever Templar preaching was going on. Rather than worry, the pair got Salus' winter clothes picked out and paid for. A novel experience for them, to just go in and be able to afford anything in the store.  
Another hour passed and they had settled into their seats at the Horned God to wait for the final member of their trio. At this point neither of them were speaking much, quietly wondering where it was Krishna had gone to.

When their phones went off, almost in tandem, they scrambled for them.  
Sal cursed and growled as his slipped out of his hands and landed behind the bar. He did his best to give his most charming smile and puppy dog eyes to the girl behind the bar, but her unimpressed look told him it hadn't worked.  
He still didn't know if she was a real Fae, or if she just dressed that way. Every time he asked Tam he just got brushed off, as if the other man thought he was joking.

"She's gone to Egypt, says it's Templar business", Tamarak's voice was grim. Grim like Tokyo grim and it made Salus' hair stand on end.

"Templar business eh? Like when I was dealing with the Phoenicians on 'Nati business.", the shadow hadn't left Tamarak's face. The set of his jaw, the tenseness of his shoulders, Sal couldn't help but feel like Tam had more answers than he ever told them.

"C'mon man, if you think we can help her we should go!"

"No Salus, not with this. We can't help her with this. Besides, it's not what's in Egypt that you have to worry about", the older man trailed off before running his hands roughly over his scalp.

"Why is it you always seem to know where we're gonna be sent before we get sent there? Is that just Dragon stuff, or somethin' else? Cause I am well and fucking tired of having you treat us like we're kids Tam"

In a smooth move, Tamarak had taken his sunglasses off and placed them on the bar before turning and jutting his face toward Salus'. Those grey, dying eyes pulsed with filth up close. You could see it, curling and pulling at skin and sclera alike.

"I have a theory, you know. That somehow, we're not just a bunch of different people being Gaia's chosen. That we're the same person, all of us. Just like we've all been that poor woman in the Tokyo subway. We're all existing, co-existing Sal. So if you wonder why I don't tell you what I think will happen, it's because it sounds crazy in my own brain. Because there is literally no way that I should know what's going to happen, or how it will happen."

Sal had to admit, when he put it like that, it sounded fucking nuts.

"But if we're all the same person, how can-"

Tamarak hissed in annoyance and turned away, putting his shades back on.  
"Yes, how can the three of us be together if we're the same person? How can we interact and individually change the physical world if we're all the same person? That's not what I'm suggesting"

Sal looked down at Tam's hands, which were gripping the bar so hard it had started to creak under the force. Nervous, pale hands wove under and around Tamarak's, causing him to slowly let go.

"What are you suggestin' then, because it might be the public school education or the total lack of culture", at this there was another hint of that smile, "Might be either of those, but as far as I know you're still speaking gibberish"

Tamarak sighed, and it was fascinating to watch the fight go out of him. Watch him turn from defensive dragon to just Plain Ol' Tamarak.  
"What I mean, Sal, is that we get the same missions from our factions. The people we talk to, in Kingsmouth, in … they used the same words when they spoke to you and Krishna. The same things happened, were still happening! It was like everything I had done there had been for nothing. That they didn't even _see_ me in those moments."

Sal sat back on his stool, let his brain chew on the words, "So… what happened to you in Kaidan. That will happen to us? Is that what you think?"

Tamarak's silence was answer enough and Salus shuddered. That flight or fight response was kicking in, making him feel like a shard of ice was growing in his chest. That terrible feeling of blood rushing to your core, urging you to go and not stop.

"I might be wrong, Salus. Hell, I might just be crazy after John dug around in my head. Who knows?"

Salus rose and tugged Tam away from the bar, heading back to the Agartha portal. "Well, we can at least wait for her, right? To come out of whatever it is? Then maybe the Temps will send her to Romania too"

He knew his voice was small, but suddenly he felt small. Maybe he could let his brain chew a little more and give Krishna a nice surprise at the same time.

Three birds, one stone, he thought smugly.

The third bird? Well, it would royally piss off his handler that he didn't immediately run to Romania on her orders. Given that he was 'an asset' now, it would be a lot harder for her to punish him as she had once threatened.


End file.
